man, i feel like i don't have enough time to continue the blog as in depth as i could but after the overwhelmingly kind comments about how helpful and sweet the blog is, i will try my hardest to continue it.
cory has all of the sheets on the different types of home dialysis so i will be leaving that out of this blog - even though i have promised others that i will talk about it. there are quite a few different home remedies but i need to educate myself a little more before i feel comfortable enough relaying the information to you.
this past week has just been a whirl wind of information and also just getting into a routine with dialysis and also eating patterns etc. cory and i have had someone over for dinner almost every night this past week. courtney and my friend amber came over last week for spaghetti, which seems to be cory's favorite. all that it is, is no salt added organic chopped tomatoes, no salt added organic stewed tomatoes, olive oil, garlic and herb mrs. dash and one small can of no salt added organic tomato paste with chopped jalapeno. i then take low fat organic ground turkey meat saute it until brown with olive oil and a little honey and then add the juices and meat to the sauce, garnished at the last minute with fresh basil and oregano. YUM - he loves it and it is a light and healthy alternative to a traditional Italian spaghetti - we have served it usually with thin organic whole wheat pasta but we switched it up with rigatoni noodles.
then, we went over to andre sr.'s and i made an interesting orange rosemary chicken. you pour a little olive oil and orange juice (fresh squeezed from jamba juice is what i used, that we you don't get any additional sugar added - it's just the orange) then you pound the chicken so it's nice and tender, roll it in olive oil and garlic then put the rosemary and black pepper on it, put them in the pan with the olive oil and orange juice and pour an extra cup in of orange juice over the chicken and baste if necessary throughout the cooking so it doesn't dry. we put it over a cup of brown rice and added hot sauce, another really light hearty meal in place of the usual orange teriyaki chicken.
lastly, cory was wanting steak, so one of his oldest friends, vince, came over with his wife stephanie for a feast. top sirloin is a great steak to have, it's juicy, really thick, but has one of the lowest fat contents of all steaks. cory broiled the steaks with black pepper and an array of mrs. dash seasonings. i made sweet potato mashed potatoes. AMAZING. the sweet potato is lower in starches then the regular potato and it was fun to watch everyone eat them for the first time and be so surprised on how yummy they were, i added fat free milk, a salt alternative, black pepper, and smart balance fake butter to make them taste as much as regular fatty mashed potatoes. my favorite part about this is sharing recipes and knowledge with everyone that comes in the door. my goal at least is to learn something new everyday about cory's condition and pass that on to someone he knows or loves him. that way you get in the habit of doing those things yourself, whether it's exercising, or using less salt in your diet, you can start to tell the difference in cory's mood as well as how he is looking. we went over to see my mom last night and she told him how different he looked from the last time, it's amazing how much liquid is retained in your body, and as my friend jody would say, how "fluffy" or bloated you start to look without even realizing it's just from the amount of salt you're in taking.
i am also trying to use as much organic as possible, not just because i was raised on it but also because of the simple advantages that it holds. there are so many added pesticides to all food that if i can help contain the amount that cory and i are ingesting, it is only added years to our lives. my goal for everyone is to buy organic as much as possible but only with things that you are directly ingesting, such as a strawberry would be a great organic item to consider where as an avacado doesn't make much difference because you are not eating the entire thing, the pesticides will be caught by the outer skin and not affect what you're eating. be considerate and educate yourself on your food, if it says natural, half of the time that just means that they've cut 50% of the pesticides then before, if it says natural on salmon, that still means that they're farming it, it's just in a "natural setting", you want to just be observant. if it says less sodium, that just means they took of 2% out of the 320mg - still over 10% of your daily value. they fool you into buying - just beware, especially if you are not only looking out for yourself but your children too!
for the most part, cory is doing great. we had a scare there for a second, we are planning to leave for hawaii and weren't set up with a dialysis center on maui, it is supposed to take over a month to set up the process and send the records, but thanks to chris at nw kidney center it is in the works and he will, with no problems, dilate in maui. we are looking forward to the time together as long as the sun, most importantly we will celebrate cory being alive and well enough to enjoy such a wonderful vacation we have been waiting for, for some time now. he is not able to get into the water, the catheter he has is VERY susceptible to disease created by the incision and if water comes into contact the germs are more likely to feed on the wet area around the incision - possibly deadly. so on that note, we will not be snorkeling. he will try to cover the catheter so that he can wade in the pool. he also cannot drink, which is fine, we have tried to fill the days with other activities so that we will be entertained. i am excited, he is as well. i will definitely have TONS of pictures and memories to share from our trip and will hopefully finish the different types of dialysis on the plane there.
until then, appreciate your health and continue to look out for your future by making small transitions in your health for large payoffs in your future!
much love.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
back to reality.
i got off of work and ran down the street to meet cory for his first out patient dialysis appointment at nw kidney center. rainy, of course but a very warm night. i remember thinking to myself, i never thought i would be getting off of work to drive to nw kidney center for cory, anyone for that matter. i also prayed for a minute to my grandparents and as my friend melinda has been teaching me and stressing me to do is to use her meditation mantra of "nah mah ha", said to yourself usually or out loud, seems like i've been screaming it at times. it is to calm the nerves and essentially bring peace to your mind body and soul, which i feel the words do tend to soothe me when said to myself. i turned to park and realized also how things really do work out for a reason, even if the reason isn't readily available to you; it will in time show it's face. i applied for two separate jobs before i landed my promotion at south center, one about 45-60 minutes away and the other about the same in traffic, and now here i am 3 minutes away from nw kidney center, easily accessible for me so that i can be there to support him. if i was accepted for the other two jobs, i wouldn't be able to see him as quickly, even in an emergency the time it would take me would be far much longer. i am thankful for my job.
i walk to the front door, that opens similar to a grocery store sliding automatic door. as soon as you walk in you can smell that of a doctor's office. taupe in color with cold silver metal accents and very quiet, just the frantic beeping of some machines and the rolling of wheelchairs. i would say there were a total of 50+ dialysis seats, they looked like over sized recliners. you had your own television and two nurses to check you out. everyone knew each other and everyone came prepared. i used this example last night when talking to my best friend amber; you know when you go to the bingo hall the regulars bring their own dobbers and good luck charms, people do the same thing with dialysis, they come with 800 books, 3 pillows, their own personal bedding, snacks galore. i felt bad because cory wasn't as prepared as we could have gotten him.
he is just sitting there. i didn't get there until almost quarter past 5 and he was to be starting dialysis around 4. the most aggrivating thing about this entire fiasco is the amount of time he is wasting. not saying that dialysis is wasted time because without it he wouldn't be here but the fact that he has to be patient and wait for a chair, then sit in that chair for four hours every other day is exhausting just to think about. at first, i had a great mind set, i'll be here, i'll support you, we'll play games, you'll sleep, i'll talk you through it but then your motivation and constant positivity can't help but be overshadowed by the sick patients walking around, some have been on dialysis over 20 years and simply just constantly having to play the waiting game. i wasn't angry, i wasn't scared, i was upset and sad more then anything. he doesn't deserve to be there he doesn't deserve to have to sit and wait for a chair when he could be at home watching a movie, at work, or enjoying his life like every other 29 year old should. instead on a cold winter night, is sharing a room with 30 other perfect strangers, who actually share more in common than most, they just have never met.
the nurses were very nice, i of course had 800 different questions. of which they were kind enough to answer all of them and then some. i was whisked away for awhile until they attached the tubes up to his semi-perminent catheter and the blood cleaning began. the nurse tried to just calm my nerves, explain to me the different types of perminent lines he can have put in to his arm or belly to make life easier than what we had to go through last night. (i will get into those different options tomorrow on a more informational blog). i left half way through to go to zumba, to clear my mind. my family and friends keep stressing to me that if i am not healthy and taking care of myself and what i need to do on a daily basis then i am going to be no help to cory. which is true but like i said in the last couple of blogs, i have a very hard time leaving him, especially if he is alone. it is not fair. he deserves someone there by his side while he goes through most likely the hardest time in his life. before i left i just put my hands on his knees and just looked up at him, like a little kid and as usual, stared at him. i told him i was sorry and that it just wasn't fare for him to be here and endure all of this. he of course just smiled down at me and as he has said from day one, told me "i'm fine". this trip was different than the others because the nurse handed me a copy of an informational sheet that pointed out the different survival rates of all of the catheters, cory's is the worst. that is why we want it out of him as soon as possible. the reason being is that it is semi-perminent, meaning that the opening to which the catheter is connected to is very open to disease and germs feed on that area if it is wet, or not clean. that is why he needs a perminent line in that is less likely to be harmful. cory didn't end up getting home from dialysis until around 10-10:30 and we didn't get to bed until 11 or 12, your sleep patterns are so thrown off which end up messing up your work days the next day. i have never been so tired and i am not even the one going through it. we try to capitalize on any days off of any periods of time where sleep can be involved.
i don't know if he is reading this blog or realized how many people this story has touched but i just try to reiterate to him every day how amazing his strength and motivation is. there are times that i look at him and know he is hurting and other times i see him smile and i can't help but smile because that's all i want, is him to feel better and honestly, as selfish as this sounds, i need him to be healthy and do what needs to be done so that we all can enjoy his presence for as long as possible. as winnie the pooh once said, "if you live to 101 i want to live until 100 so that i don't have to live a day without you." that may not be quoted perfectly, but you get where i am coming from. i find myself wondering where i would be right now if we had never met and i am sure he thinks the same.
i have been getting plenty of e-mails with follow up questions and just comments and compliments about how well everyone is handling this situation and how much they enjoy the blog and i just love hearing that. i truly enjoy taking the time out of my day to talk about it and hope that everyone will stay connected not just through this but continue to check in with cory as he has quite a long road ahead.
tomorrow i will follow up with the different types of dialysis cory is looking into and when he will make that final decision. i'll tell you it will definitely be sooner than later that he is able to give himself his own shot and do dialysis at home in his sleep. stay tuned!
much love.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
a new outlook. a new life.
the biggest thing for cory is going to be the inability to eat what he wants. just yesterday we realized there isn't any sodium in candy, which was a disasterous decision to allow each other to have skittles and nerds at the movies. when we got home he broke out in a cold sweat, which over course made me panick and told him to call dr. fung. he then reminded me that all he had eaten was pineapple, jerky, a couple sweet potato crackers, and candy. duh, tessa, you're feeding this man fruit, which is great, and water, and finding all of the low sodium substitutes that you can rack your brain for, but in the end, his diet still needs to be nutritious and balanced. it may sound like an easy task but given all of the restrictions its much harder than you think.
what he can have:
he can have fruit, he would prefer mango and pineapple which of course are the fruits that are full of the most natural sugars, he also likes apples, but i'd like to try to get him to eat more antioxidant rich fruits such as raspberries blue berries acai berry, those types. he can also have whole grains, such as pastas, breads, rices. we are going to live off of uncle ben's 90 sec packs of brown rice. they are DELICIOUS but also very low in sodium which is hard to find in rices. we also enjoy the eating right brand from safeway, which is where we get the grains from. i live and die by crazy dave's bread. they now have a lite version with just under 30mg of sodium in each peice which is a prime number for cory to try to stick to. he can have all of the colors of the rainbow when it comes to veggies but cannot have premade things such as salsa, dips, most dressings, he can't have catsup, bbq sauces, anything that cory would have had regularly, is gone. he is supposed to have only one cup of dairy a day, including all yogurts, milks, cheeses, ice cream, whatever, only a cup. he also can only have 4 cups of liquid, they are just trying to make sure that his kidneys essentially keep afloat without too much liquid because they are so small they can't retain as a regular kidney would, hense why cory's ankles were so swollen.
what he cannot have.
dairy.
salt.
sugar.
salt water seafood.
high potasium/phosphate.
high fat.
high fat meats such as beef.
high salt meats such as pork.
starches.
anything that tastes good, i tell him he usually cannot have.
alcohol.
i pride myself on eating extremely healthy most of the time and i am quite knowledgable when it comes to what is healthy how to eat it when to have it, etc. this is where the "people meet for a reason" come in. when i met cory he would go to quizno's for a salad, or famous dave's, or have a steak, his diet was very all over the place, we would shop for food together but would basically have two different carts. what he didn't know is when i cooked for him, the things that he now HAS to do, he was already doing whether he knew it or not. i never used regular butter, rarely salt, and never used cheese, and always low sodium in any soups, pasta sauces i made. it is so funny how our brain in wired where if it sounds healthy it has got to taste like shit. luckily, i have the patience to try new dishes for him until we can nail down what works, what he can have on a daily basis and won't hate to have for left overs the next day. before cory came home, i was at his house baking salads for lunches for him, and also baking chicken with peppers to have for lunches too. the key to being organized is being prepared. have lunches prepared for him, have frozen soups for him to microwave just in case i can't make it home in time to make him something.
this wasn't the easiest post to read i think but i think it is one of the most beneficial, especially if you are seeing cory frequently. it is up to us, meaning is friends and family to help him stay on a healthy and productive eating path, we all know how easy it is to fall off of the path but when your life truly depends on it, you can't imagine how strong you truly can be when it comes to sticking to a very strict diet. i have decided to eat just what he can in order to keep my blood pressure down, (120/70 thank you very much) and just to maintain a lifestyle for the both of us that is fare. i would kill him if he hate doritos in front of me if i couldn't have them. so i'm taking one for the team, as you should as well when you are around him.
please e-mail me with any great recipes that i could be using for him, the more options and ideas the merrier. just remember his guidelines!
ps. last night we made lobster tail, wild salmon, a red/yellow pepper, olive oil/rosemary/balsalmic/garlic sauce with whole wheat pasta. so easy, took around 15-20 min for everything and we both were very full.
cheers!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
he is home!
at around 10:30 after doing so many loads of laundry i thought my limbs were going to fall off, i got a call from cory, and no matter how much pain he had endured this past few weeks he always try's to keep it light for me. i answer and he says, "guess what? daddy's coming home", first he knows i hate the word daddy and secondly i appreciated the humor but was so emotional to know that this part was over. no more long nights up every four hours to check his vitals or just sittin around waiting for an answer as to why his blood pressure was so high. with that also comes a sense of anxiety - there isn't anyone to check if he's ok. he slept through the night and erin, corys mom slept one more night on the couch.
what does the new catheter look like? the new catheter is just down a few inches from where the last one was, still looking the same and he is incredibly sore from the surgery. he is setting up appointments today for his dialysis here and also hawaii, those should be some interesting blogs from the hospital in hawaii....he can't get it wet and it definitely is covered by his shirt - he still has a bandage where the other one was.
i watched him fall asleep last night and probably will continue to do that until i feel more secure about his condition. i completely understand where my sister was coming from when my second nephew Killion, was fighting for his life when he was born, i always use to laugh because she would want him to sleep with her instead of in his own bed because she could check his breath patterns, i now find myself doing the same thing to a grown man.
i took cory to work this morning at 5 am and he was quickly sent home by 8:30 due to his lack of meds (that I was getting at the pharmacy) and his high blood pressure. he is luckily on restriction at work but is still getting paid for his time there. we have ran some errands around town and will plan to relax around the house and get all of his appointments and medications schedules down. i bought him a home calendar that's on the wall and a personal planner to take along with him so that he is always where he needs to be and i can stay updated with the one at home.
the key for us is just going to be communication, consistency, and patience. this is an entirely new world for everyone involved and if you are not communicating what's going on, being consistent with your meds, diet, and exercise and being patient and loving one another then it's going to be a long road.
Monday, January 2, 2012
lessons learned.
obviously speaking from my own eternal grown these past few days i have really taken into consideration the power of a family. whether you are blood related or just a friend who has created such a strong bond with another friend that you adopt that person into your family, it is amazing to me how powerful that connection can be in a time of crisis. we have spent over 144 hours in this hospital and out of those 144 hours Cory has been alone for maybe ten. The love that has surrounded him, placed him on prayer lists, and just looking at his Facebook wall, you can see what a powerful impact he has on everyone. The fact that Erin took days off of work, Courtney, Jovon, Andre Sr., and Eric, spent their hard earned break in a small hospital bed laughing and hoping to put a glim of hope into Cory's somewhat dim spirit. Vince brought his daughter and wife to be there for support and Rashon and Daniese spent new years with us in the small room, when they could have been anywhere else. Friends poured in and even when they couldn't be there, like Gerald Smiley, he called his mom who was local and made her come down at 10:00pm to make sure everything was being done to make him feel secure. For me, it was mechanical, if you love someone the caring is natural and sharing a twin hospital bed or holding hands while falling asleep on the roll out was just a part of the deal. I took two days off of work and took two showers in the five days I was there. When I left, I felt like I was missing something, like a doctors visit or a check to see if his heart rate had gone down. I stayed away for maybe two hours...I can't help but go back and rub his feet or just simply hold his hand. I've been staring at him alot.
The past few days have been filled with family. Last night Jovon and the kids along with Courtney, Erin, Cory and myself took a couple hours together and just played board games. On new years many people tried to stop in before going out, others came to ring in the new year in Cory's room. Gold balloons filled the ceiling and we had tons of sparkling water and vitamin water to go around. It was like a slumber party and I know Cory appreciated everyone there.
So what now?
At this moment Cory is undergoing another round of dialysis. Today his neck catheter was taken out and he has an abdominal catheter that is more permanent. He said the surgery was making him a bit sore in the abdomen but otherwise if all goes well he will be coming home tonight.
I haven't been there since around two so I am quite uncertain about everything that went down today - I will post tomorrow some photos of Cory's new catheter and the information that will be given to him from the northwest kidney center.
He plans to go back to work tomorrow and we are going to Hawaii on the 12th. He will be sober and not able to get the catheter wet so we plan to just sit pool side and take some adventures around the island. I think he deserves nothing less than a week in paradise.
As for me, I took today to get his house cleaned and do the 10 loads of laundry that have continually been put off in the past weeks. I also took the task of grocery shopping for Cory and his new diet. I have bought two new books, one being the Dash Diet book, which is basically explaining a low sodium diet, how it works, why it works, and how to maintain a balanced diet while on it. The other was given to me by a dear friend, Jeri Glogovac, who has always been a mentor to me, especially health and cooking wise, she is an amazing cook and everything is healthy. She told me about a book called Eat, Drink and be healthy. I bought both on my iPad and hope to read them while on vacation.
I will also blog more about Cory's restrictions food and life wise tomorrow but I must get back to laundry. I wanted to atleast keep everyone updated from new years.
Thank you also for all of the kind words towards what I am trying to do with this blog. He is so precious to me and I know he is to you as well. May the new year find you happy and healthy.
Until Next Time,
Love Tessa
Sunday, January 1, 2012
motivation.
straight ahead of cory in ICU was a board. i often write motivational or loving words to him and sneak them in to his wallet or write them on a board at either of our houses for him to read in the morning. on the second day while he was sleeping i wrote, "you are loved. you are strong. you will get through this." so that every time he wakes up he can see those words and realize he will overcome whatever odds he needs to with the help and support of his friends and family and not to mention the doctors and staff.
answers to your questions.
many people are floored at cory's quick decrease to dialysis and the sudden need for him to be admitted to the hospital. he is 29 years old and is in good health, high blood pressure does run in his family and all of his immediate family, including his father, mother and two sisters all have been forced to take high blood pressure medication to maintain a safe pressure.
symptoms?
his symptoms as we look back, may have been more than we realized. his number one symptom was the fact that for the past month straight he was throwing up every morning. about two weeks ago i heard him and joke now that i thought he had an eating disorder, or we both joke that he was going to be the first pregnant male. jokes aside, he should have been seen by a doctor weeks before but thankfully with a little push by me he finally made an appointment. other symptoms were swollen feet, and a friend of the family said that within the last week he did not look or act the same as he usually did. his eyes seemed glazed over and his appetite was not to same, not to mention he did feel as if he was short of breath during his sleep.
everything else about him was normal. he felt no chest pain or head ache, even though his blood pressure was probably randing somewhere between 170-190/upper hundreds. this was the scary part and if he wouldn't have taken the doctor's orders to get his ass to the emergency room, this blog may be of a different theme and tone. we are blessed that he was able to be taken care of before it was too late.
timeline?
cory arrived at the hospital on december 28th in the morning. he woke up and without even saying anything about receiving a phone call from the doctor he woke me up and said he was going to the ER. i asked if he wanted me to come with him and he replied no, so i went to my dentist appointment where i got the news that he was going to stay over night for testing. what turned into confusion quickly turned into panic. i quickly called his mother, erin, and his sister courtney, who was sick that day. erin was very upset and rightfully so, her family has a long history of kidney and heart disease, some ending in death. we all came together in the afternoon to surround his bed with good energy and love, he was certain he would get out the next day. at around 2 or 3 courtney was admitted to the hospital for her symptoms as well, the family was going back and forth between courtney's room and cory's. closer in the evening cory's kidney doctor, dr. fung arrived and examined cory's neck, feet, chest, and blood tests. what started off with a simple questionnaire ended with doctor fung closing the door and informing cory that he was going to begin dialysis this evening to control his blood pressure and try to salvage his kidneys, which he explained were only working at 9% out of 100%. later, we also found out that cory's kidneys were different in size, one being almost 50% smaller than the other, for how long? we would never know. for the next three days cory under went kidney dialysis and was placed on a renal diet. the first day of dialysis lasted for 2.5 hours, they were trying to maximize the amount of blood they could clean but wanted to minimize the size affects on cory's body for never experiencing dialysis before. the second day the nurse came in for 3 hours, most of the time cory was able to luckily sleep and the second day for four hours he was hooked up to the dialysis machine. with the help of dialysis and overall after the three days his blood pressure went down to it's lowest of 130 where as when he was admitted it was easily in the 200's. he was in ICU until Saturday night when he was admitted to a lower urgency wing, he was free of all of the cords he had to wear 24 hours a day in ICU and could finally take a shower, walk around, and unfortunately share a bed with me. i have left him four times since he arrived and every time i do i feel guilty. i would be with him 24 hour a day if i could and i am if my job permits. we have shared his hospital bed two nights now and i'm praying that tomorrow will be our last stay and finally he will be able to come home. new years was spent in his room with family and friends celebrating the uphill battle we are winning with his condition and basically celebrating cory being alive and well enough to smile and most importantly give me a kiss on new years. the fright and heartache is definitely left in the dust with 2011 and all of the positive energy has been created and constructed so that 2012 will be a year of successful and triumphant memories only making cory stronger, and skinnier at that. i forgot to mention cory has lost almost 10 pounds since being in the hospital and says that his new years resolution is to get down to 215, which i will gladly help him with. today is a rest day and tomorrow is another day of dialysis and a meeting with dr. fung consulting him on his next steps with dialysis.
what is dialysis?
in the photo above you see cory in the bed with his nurse, rich, who has become apart of the family. he has all of the answers to all of our questions, good or bad. the first day cory had reggie, who was incredibly helpful as well from the northwest kidney center. these men and women travel throughout 9 (i believe) different hospitals throughout the area and set up this giant machine (which is also pictured above) that slightly resembles a mixing table or a large tape recorder. the set up for the machine takes about an hour and it consists of the doctor prepping the machine and also cory. cory is able to have visitors during the process which ranges from 3-8 hour periods. the machine is prepped by cleaning the entire thing with saleen solution. the machine is bleach free and the water that is created after it is cleaned is the cleanest water available, oxygenated and completely purified. once the machine has been cleaned the doctor cleans cory's catheter which at this moment in time is located on the right side of his neck, which is called a central venous catheter is used when performing hemodialysis. hemodialysis works by circulating the blood through special filters outside your body. blood flows across a semi-permeable membrane (called the dialyzer) with solutions that help remove toxins. because hemodialysis requires a blood flow larger than a regular IV tube would allow, dialysis uses unique ways of accessing the blood in the blood vessels. This access can be temporary (dialysis catheters) or permanent (surgically joining an artery to a vein.). blood is then taken from the access point in the patient's body to a dialysis machine. chemical imbalances and impurities in your blood are corrected and the blood is then returned to your body. typically, most patients undergo hemodialysis for three sessions every week. this type of treatment takes place at a dialysis center, and each session lasts about three to four hours. Northwest Kidney Centers locations offer patients a variety of amenities to make each session more comfortable. i should also mention that it doesn't hurt at all, cory cannot feel the catheter.
what is a normal blood pressure for him?
i would say anything under 150/90 would be to his best benefit. he was once down to 131/85 and erin quickly took a photograph of it because it was such a momentous occasion.
will he be able to work?
so far dr. fung has said that it will be just fine for cory to return back to his job at boeing. he plans to take some time off before he does that and get used to his life on dialysis.
what about your trip to hawaii?
great question :) we are still going, cory and i planned a trip to hawaii months ago and once he was admitted it was the first question out of everyone's mouth, if it was going to be possible for him to travel. the advice i have gotten from other dialysis patients is that if you are willing and able, then nothing is impossible. amazing things happen and we are both ready to go on the adventure of continuing his dialysis down in hawaii. after he gets his set dialysis schedule on monday we will know more about the location on maui where it will take place and i will obviously keep everyone up to date through the blog on how it goes.
how are his spirits?
i really haven't mentioned much about how he is feeling about all of this. with the help of all of his friends and family and all of the guests he has had in and out of the hospital there has been little time to feel like a victim. a good friend of mine, jonathan moore under went a kidney transplant from his wife this past year and he gave me the best advice which i listened to and ran with. he told cory to be an advocate for yourself, it is your body and you are in charge, listen to your doctors but never hesitate to research it yourself and never be afraid to speak your mind and vocalize your opinions to your doctors. be positive and most importantly realize that your life isn't over and you can live a fulfilling life on dialysis and with a transplant. he has been smiling and cheerful and most importantly he has realized that his life was just saved and that he will continue to live every day to the fullest from now on. he is my hero.
if you have any other questions please don't hesitate to e-mail me, tessaquigley@gmail.com, i'd love to answer.
happy new year!
how we became.
i guess it may be important to introduce ourselves and how we became a couple. we met over the summer after quite some time of trial and error. his sister, courtney, is one of my best friends and i did not want that relationship interfering with another. we met each other a couple times and eventually found ourselves (cory, courtney and i) having dinner together after a very long day. i saw the love he had for his family and the quiet but confident demeanor and i started to find myself becoming more and more curious about him. he had been sweet on me since the beginning of 2011 and it took me almost the entire year to give him a chance. we started speaking in late july and as i left for new york in early august, i spoke with him every day until i returned. he picked me up from the airport on august 19th, since then we have spent no more than three nights without each other. it was sudden and many people were shocked at the time it took us to fall in love but when it comes to something like that there is no time limitation, if you know in your heart that this is a person who you want to spend your time with - why ask questions?
the great thing about the relationship is his friends and my friends are intertwined already and the fact that we came together was exciting for everyone. our personalities are very different. he is calm, more of a homebody and incredibly protective. i am loud and love to be a social butterfly whenever possible. i think we have both realized that in order to create something that is going to work and stay successful, you have to compromise. we both live in two completely different cities, i live downtown and he lives in federal way. we have managed to delegate time between both homes and most importantly learn from each other and build a relationship on trust and communication. we have great supportive friends that we love to share our time with but my favorite time of the day is coming home from a long day at work and sitting next to him on the couch. we may not have a lavish, wild, exciting relationship but we do have each other and a bond that has been tested after we found out about his condition.
i should also mention that without raychael rigney, cory and i would have never met. ray and i met at nordstrom and she introduced me to courtney, cory's little sister. i still remember the first time we all hung out as a group. courtney said, "cory would be going crazy right now. cory would be all over tessa". the rest is history and i am so thankful for him. he makes me a better person every day. i love him and will continue to be the support, along with the rest of his loving family, to get him through this next hurdle.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)